vmh, if the Furbies really talked and said things like that, I'd buy them!
My worst present was from my MIL. I don't remember if it was our first Christmas together or the next but it was a hideous painting of a clown that she'd obviously gotten at a thrift shop and painted her initials on, directly over the real artist's. (She writes on EVERY single thing she gives to any of us.....toys, jewelry, stuffed animals- whatever. She is compelled to write on it.) Then a basket of soaps that was wrapped in plastic, looked 10 years old, and had dust and hair on it. I know it came off the back of the toilet....I know it.
At the time, I thought this was a thinly-veiled insult but after 23 years, I know this is just her. She's bi-polar and just in the past year has gotten much sweeter- without meds, strangely enough.
She came to the hospital the day Jacob was born to give us a piggy bank she'd "made" for him. It was a styrofoam cup with a lid that she'd sliced a slot into. It looked like she'd painted the sides of it with sparkly nail polish and there was a sticky residue in the bottom of the cup.
She'd also made a "plaque" out of the white foam bottom from when you buy ground beef. I was pretty horrified at that one.
We have tried for years and years to get her help but she refuses and says "I'm not crazy..." and I say "No, you aren't. You have a condition that's no different from my hypothyroidism and you need to be on medication for it." But she always refused. We never knew if we'd get fast-talking, manic happy mil or the slooooow talking, blank stare, super-negative one.
Recently though...big change. I hope it lasts, it's been nice. She even gave me a music box that plays What a Wonderful World.
We call each other frequently and I've been taking her to Veteran's to try and get her some money.