Banter About Bret

**Posted:** Fri Aug 01, 2008 7:53 pm

aom192 wrote:

hellomyfriend wrote:

More Bret quotes:

"I can't be tickling all night. I'm not even ticklish. ... No, I'm faking it. Yeah, she's faking it as well, I think."

"Why are you moving out? Is it something I've done? ... Is it 'cause of the towel? ... 'Cause I used your towel and I got athlete's foot? ... It's not that? ... Is it my mold farm? ... Are you sick of my mold farm? ... Is it aspergillus fumigatus? ... You sure? ... Was it something from a while ago? ... When we were at school and you said you got a hickey from Judy Bailey, I told everyone it was the vacuum cleaner? ... Is that it? ... But you did. ... Yes, you did. ... Well, it was a perfectly round hickey. ... Well, it was exactly the same size as the vacuum cleaner tube. ... Oh! Is it because I drank all the orange juice? ... Is it because I drank all the apple juice? ... Was it something psychological? Because I put you down in front of other people? ... He wouldn't know, 'cause he's got no idea. ... Well, is it because I ask too many questions? ... Was it something subtle? ... Is it 'cause I eat too loudly? ... It is? I knew it!"

"Who took that photo?"

"What about a planet of diamonds and rubies?"

"Well, it's difficult to draw a wolf, so I used a picture of myself and then adjusted it."

how long did it take you to write that???? :shock:

You mean the mold farm bit?

It took me as long to type it as it took him to say it. Then I listened a second time to clean up my mistakes. I'm quite a speedy typist. :type:

**Posted:** Fri Aug 01, 2008 7:59 pm

hellomyfriend wrote:

aom192 wrote:

hellomyfriend wrote:

More Bret quotes:

"I can't be tickling all night. I'm not even ticklish. ... No, I'm faking it. Yeah, she's faking it as well, I think."

"Why are you moving out? Is it something I've done? ... Is it 'cause of the towel? ... 'Cause I used your towel and I got athlete's foot? ... It's not that? ... Is it my mold farm? ... Are you sick of my mold farm? ... Is it aspergillus fumigatus? ... You sure? ... Was it something from a while ago? ... When we were at school and you said you got a hickey from Judy Bailey, I told everyone it was the vacuum cleaner? ... Is that it? ... But you did. ... Yes, you did. ... Well, it was a perfectly round hickey. ... Well, it was exactly the same size as the vacuum cleaner tube. ... Oh! Is it because I drank all the orange juice? ... Is it because I drank all the apple juice? ... Was it something psychological? Because I put you down in front of other people? ... He wouldn't know, 'cause he's got no idea. ... Well, is it because I ask too many questions? ... Was it something subtle? ... Is it 'cause I eat too loudly? ... It is? I knew it!"

"Who took that photo?"

"What about a planet of diamonds and rubies?"

"Well, it's difficult to draw a wolf, so I used a picture of myself and then adjusted it."

how long did it take you to write that???? :shock:

You mean the mold farm bit?

It took me as long to type it as it took him to say it. Then I listened a second time to clean up my mistakes. I'm quite a speedy typist. :type:

a true bretter would write all that out well done!!!!
:wink:

**Posted:** Fri Aug 01, 2008 9:17 pm

"Oh, is that why you were there?"

"No, we've been too busy with the race war."

"Banana balls!"

"Try putting some wings on your bird. There we go. That's much nicer."

"Like in Top Gun?"

"Yeah, I don't want to hear that again."

"Do you think I dress too provocatively?"

"I guess I want to show her a little bit of arm. 'Cause I don't want her to lose interest entirely."

"Well, you're not going to sleep any better up there."

"She jumped on top of me and then touched me on the penis."

"Would you please get out of here? I'm having a shower."

"Did you buy some sawdust as well?"

**Posted:** Sat Aug 02, 2008 12:30 am

I bet people have seen this before, but it is soo cute. Bret with Gemma and Carmel playing "Ten Guitars."
Uke solo! :jc:

http://ukulelecabaret.com/tenguitars

**Posted:** Sat Aug 02, 2008 2:58 am

As a matter of fact, we have. :nod:

Check out the thread for "Wellington International Ukulele Orchestra" under Bret. There is lots of Ukulele fun there! :yay:

Please enjoy!

**Posted:** Thu Aug 07, 2008 4:05 am

Thanks tvldiva!

I think I broke this thread.... :sofa:

**Posted:** Thu Aug 07, 2008 10:50 am

HBThingy wrote:

Thanks tvldiva!

I think I broke this thread.... :sofa:

oh no you haven't! :goodman:

I wonder if Bret gets any time to practise on his uke..... We wouldn't want him to be rubbish at his next WIUO performance :tsk:

**Posted:** Fri Aug 08, 2008 1:45 am

I'm sure he is. Fortunately, ukulele's are nice and compact. :jc:

**Posted:** Fri Aug 08, 2008 4:22 am

I think he uses a baritone uke. I think it's an easy transition from guitar then.

I feel a bit silly I bought a uke two weeks ago because of FOTC and WIUO. I'm really enjoy it and it is so different from flutes. Maybe I can show Jemaine how to be a concert flautist. :wink:

Back to Bret....so both times of stage diving.....no one caught him?
At first, the air guitar video made it look like it was successful, but the Largo thread talked about how operation stage dive failed once again lol.

**Posted:** Fri Aug 08, 2008 6:32 pm

HBThingy wrote:

I feel a bit silly I bought a uke two weeks ago because of FOTC and WIUO. I'm really enjoy it and it is so different from flutes. Maybe I can show Jemaine how to be a concert flautist. :wink:

Back to Bret....so both times of stage diving.....no one caught him?
At first, the air guitar video made it look like it was successful, but the Largo thread talked about how operation stage dive failed once again lol.

Don't feel silly. It's cool that Bret has inspired you. Sometimes I look at the guitar that sits in the corner of my living room, the one I taught myself to play (badly) but haven't picked up in 3 years and think of how cool it would be to play Conchords songs on it, then I go back to my lazy ways. :roll:

Both times his stage dive was unsuccessful. Something tells me he'll keep at it coz I think he just gets caught up in the excitement and to hell with everything else. Let's just hope he never smushes his pretty face in a failed dive.

**Posted:** Fri Aug 08, 2008 6:42 pm

I was watching a Seinfeld ep last night and Kramer wore an eyepatch (I don't think it was a funky one though) and fell over, I think he may have even been near a table but dont quote me on that.

**Posted:** Wed Aug 13, 2008 4:31 am

SheWolf wrote:

HBThingy wrote:

I feel a bit silly I bought a uke two weeks ago because of FOTC and WIUO. I'm really enjoy it and it is so different from flutes. Maybe I can show Jemaine how to be a concert flautist. :wink:

Back to Bret....so both times of stage diving.....no one caught him?
At first, the air guitar video made it look like it was successful, but the Largo thread talked about how operation stage dive failed once again lol.

Don't feel silly. It's cool that Bret has inspired you. Sometimes I look at the guitar that sits in the corner of my living room, the one I taught myself to play (badly) but haven't picked up in 3 years and think of how cool it would be to play Conchords songs on it, then I go back to my lazy ways. :roll:

Both times his stage dive was unsuccessful. Something tells me he'll keep at it coz I think he just gets caught up in the excitement and to hell with everything else. Let's just hope he never smushes his pretty face in a failed dive.

Aww thanks SW! Bret and Jemaine are great inspiration. Guitar would have been a second pick, but the uke is soo much cheaper.

Yup, my poor flute is sitting in the corner as well. Bad memories of lessons and marching band start to come up when I play it. It's haunted!

That would be tragic if he broke something from a stage dive. Yup, he'll keep trying, but maybe he should warn people that he wants to do it so that they are prepared. :supz:

**Posted:** Wed Aug 13, 2008 4:29 pm

HBThingy wrote:

...maybe he should warn people that he wants to do it so that they are prepared. :supz:

Wouldn't that get rid of the excitement of the stage dive thing?

**Posted:** Wed Aug 13, 2008 4:38 pm

Yes it would and these dives strike me as pretty spontaneous so I doubt he'd be warning people ahead of time.

**Posted:** Wed Aug 13, 2008 8:20 pm

I think his Mum needs to have a talk with him about it

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Banter About Bret

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